Back to Blogger and Beyond

I've not blogged ina long time. Blogs seem to be going out of fashion, but to tell you the truth, I still really love this format. The reason I've not blogged is because, at first I was too busy getting ready for the move, etc, and since moving in here in november, we've not had the internet (or a TV!) until now (still no TV, which may well be a good thing for me. No Oprah and cooking shows to distract me from my thesis).

Which brings me to the point in my life that I am at. After going on the dole and taking a break from study, I have returned. And this time I am quietly determined to work my ass off.

I have just paused in a four hour late night stint of thesis-writing, and am proud to say I wrote almost a thousand words - most of it thesis quality!

This is the year I complete it. This year is make or break for me. It'll be Dr Emma next year, or the last three years will have been wasted (in at least some ways). I have never failed to scrape-in and make it at the last minute before, pull a miracle out of my ass, finish with a burst of proliffic brilliance, etc. And I don't intend my PhD to be my fisrt major failure.

The house is great. We don't always have clenliness, but we have love and tolerance, and everyone is doing their best - with their own lives and as a householder. Manic and Panic are both working. Panic is enrolling in uni, and Manic is making me even prouder than I always was of her.

There's so much I want to write about - our house-warming, my first time back at Manbangle in months, Brian, Jen, Alan and Stefan, Jamie's soulful trip to Arq, talking to Fiona (my author) at Baddog, the sadness of losing a friend. The happiness of finding a home. But I want to take a shower, so I'll leave all that for now.

But what I do want to write about is Aaron. Aaron has come as a surprise. At a time when I am self-focussed and determined not to let myself slide from my path again. He is full of surprises - eagerness, sharp intellegence, intuition, tenderness, courtesy, passion and anxiety, tolerance and hope, fear and beauty.

I am lately not used to being treated with such care and respect. It is nice to take chances and not be bruised again and again. We are both cautious in our own way. We try to open up. Perhaps I need to have more belief in others, and he in himself.

It is a lovely affair, and it makes me smile.


------------ I will update more frequently now, but go out less with all this study. So, keep an eye on this space, and don't forget to ask me out for coffee, etc. I'm not becoming a thesis hermit!